Snooze Button Surfing

To snooze or not to snooze, for that is the real question facing the unwilling participants of “alarm clock Britain.” Across Albion’s green and fertile lands are tired office workers dragging themselves out from beneath warm and faithful bed sheets. Whilst it is hard to derive any pleasure from this hateful obligation, for the thrill seeking employee, gambling against the alarm clock is just the motivation needed to begin the working day.

Once the alarm clock has sounded, there are only two options available to the Rip van Winkle wannabee - to sleep or not to sleep. Whilst the lesser slacker diligently marches themselves to the nearest bathroom, the half-conscious daredevil shuns the ‘call to work’ and fires a well aimed shot at the alarm clock snooze button.

Gambling on the number of times that one can press snooze before being irreversibly late for work, provides hours of entertainment/sleep. Whilst most athletes attribute their accomplishments to hard work and dedication, the “Snooze Button Surfer” can achieve unrivalled success without ever needing to open an eyelid. One “Surfer” be-known to the Daily Grindstone, once claimed to have left himself just six minutes before stepping out of the door. How did he achieve this? Idleness and the occasional late night.

After a few weeks of snooze surfing, one will appreciate the simple pleasure that comes from mastering your alarm clock. No longer shall that mechanical Hitler decide when you rise from your slumber!